Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Romantic UPDATE

Naomichan and I have become a lot closer lately. She even told me the reason she was out (and don't ask me; I won't tell). She's been opening up to me a lot, and even showing some emotions that she usually keeps hidden. I've been making progress as well. I am now pretty sure of how I feel about her: I love her, deeply. It seems sudden, of course, but I felt it since the first time she stepped into my presence, so it's not so horrible to confirm it six months later, is it?
Today I had a little bit of a screwup. Yesterday I mailed her telling her that I'd be glad to give her any support she needs. I was aware of the risk that it'd be rejected because of my sounding too much like a parent, too meticulously affirming, perhaps, for comfort. I logged on this morning and found that I had no response, even though I asked for one. I freaked out, thinking for an hour or so that I had screwed up somewhere and she now was angry at me (as this seems like the way she deals with things she dislikes: ignoring them). I apologized profusely, detrimenting myself and asking for forgiveness. Eventually, she came online and expressed that it was all a misunderstanding. I imagine (and hope) that she's telling the truth, but even otherwise, she at least has forgiven me. Either way, however, I got a taste of the stress and steady streams of strong emotion that I'm undoubtedly in for.
I'm buying some manga from her, and so she's coming over on friday. I think that at one point I'll ask her out for coffee/tea over a weekend or something.
She agreed to act in my movie for Film class, which is nice, since she's who I had in mind since the beginning. She plays Simula, a vindictive AI girl programmed by her reclusive, antisocial creator (played by me) to implement the Instrumentality of Mankind through Gaia's awakening.
Also, she's set to come back to school in about three weeks. This is nice because that means I'll get to see her at least once every other day (she's in my Philosophy class, and since that is third block, she's in lunch with me too).

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